The Dallas Stars world was rocked this past Friday and I haven’t stopped thinking about it since.
I love to write but just never have time anymore... being a working mom of an infant and "strong willed" toddler with a husband who is working 24/7... actually.. not only can I not write but I’m barely hanging on for dear life. But I digress. For this, the toddler finally gets the iPad he’s been asking for all weekend, the baby happens to be taking a perfectly timed nap, and I’m pouring a third cup of coffee. I’m even busting out the ol cancer blog to serve as a forum. (Blogging about hockey is much preferred, btw.)
For reference, I was the team rink side reporter for 2 and a half seasons, and produced and hosted a weekly "pump up" show on the team in which I took pride in trying to show off the players funny and endearing personalities. I worked on that show for the better part of 8 seasons with one season off in between. That show was my baby before I had a real baby. For that one season away from the show, in 2010, I was working for the Stars in community relations. I worked day to day with the players in an effort to help grow their presence in the DFW community. My husband whom I met along the way has been on the coaching staff for the team for 9 seasons too, but in this case, that’s neither here nor there besides that it’s given me a better view of these players personalities and who they really are.
I’m in talk radio now, and this week we got a feast of juicy news to discuss when it comes to my beloved little hockey team. This week came the news of the Stars CEO, Jim Lites, making waves through the hockey world. In a nutshell, he called for a couple members of the Dallas media to come provide some willing ears, manufacturing his own mini audience who he knew would have a pen, paper, and twitter account ready to blast off at any given moment. Lites proceeded to rip into Jamie Benn and Tyler Seguin, calling them "F*cking horsesh*t", proceeding to go on and on.... and on... using derogatory statements and curse words to lash out at his two top Star players and their recent performances at work. We’ve all read the articles by now and know the gritty details. It sounded like a frustrated team exec who was venting and accidentally forgot to say "off the record." Perhaps he should have just "saved to draft." But he very much meant for his words to go viral. And boy, did he get his wish.
No doubt the Stars CEO has a great track record in this industry and quite obviously knows a lot more about this business than little ol me. He must be so frustrated, just as the fans and staff are, that this team has not lived up to it’s potential year after year. The ownership group has a lot of money invested. Money I can’t even dream about. I don’t know what that investment would feel like and the kind of emotions it would elicit. I’m too scared to put $20 down on a blackjack table or play in a real fantasy football league with money on the line. For the Stars organization, a lot of money, and unfortunately, jobs, are most definitely on the line. I’m just sad that this is what it has come to.
Jamie Benn and Tyler Seguin no doubt heard their tough critiques as soon as we all did on Friday afternoon. On Saturday when asked, they responded. And in my humble opinion, they nailed it. They said all the right things. They said they’re going to rally from this and I have no doubt that they will. But they clearly looked hurt from their CEO’s words. How could they not be? I’ve been talked down to and belittled by a boss before to the point where I had anxiety as a result and couldn’t sleep at night. It sucks. And I’m not working there anymore. I wanted to be valued. These guys are much more invested than I was and I sure do hope they’re not going anywhere for a long time. Yes, they need to step up their game and find a way to pull their team out of the mid range mud pit in the Western Conference that we’ve all come to know too well. But regardless of the harsh realities of the situation, I felt the need to share what I know about these two Stars superstars. If nothing else, hopefully this can combat some of the negativity that’s out there surrounding their names in the hockey world right now and also pull back the curtain a bit for those who don’t get the chance to see what we see.
First of all-- and this is what gets lost in professional sports and unfortunately, passionate fandom all too often, is that professional athletes are people first. They read all the tweets and critiques, and they have to deal with a lot of outside distractions and social media bullying that is hard for us regular folk to comprehend. Jamie and Tyler are real humans with real emotions. They’re not thoroughbreds that need a good whipping to get in shape. They’re more than a living, breathing, skating salary cap hit. Jamie Benn and Tyler Seguin may be millionaire NHL players, but they are some of the nicest, most kind hearted and most stand up guys that I know.
Tyler Seguin is so good at his craft, so famous, and so socially relevant that he could easily be a total jerk if he wanted to. But he’s not. He stops to takes pictures and sign autographs whenever he can. He’ll wear a silly Christmas hat and sings carols at a children’s hospital or even in the locker room if you ask him to. (Jamie will wear a sillier hat and lead the vocals.) Tyler donates a chunk of his salary to the community and the Boys and Girls Club of DFW. He designed and built their kids an outdoor hockey rink and playground. He makes it a point to personally connect with and develop relationships with the kids within the BBBS organization. He quietly seeked out his minor hockey team in Whitby, Ontario this season and treated them to an NHL game to come see the Stars play the Maple Leafs in Toronto. He hosts his younger sisters in Dallas often and listens to girl talk. He spoils and laughs with his mom. He’s a charismatic family guy with a good heart who just happens to be really freaking good at hockey. He just committed 8 years to this organization, taking a deal that may not make him as rich as he could have been had he entered free agency, but he wanted to be here in Dallas. He calls Dallas home. And his superstar status with a down to earth demeanor is a giant part of the reason why this team is (I think?) is back on the map in DFW.
Jamie Benn plays with grit, toughness, and passion while at the same time giving off the vibe of a kid on a rink in Canada somewhere laughing and horsing around, (no pun intended) just playing the game he loves. It may be tough for him, as it is for any NHL player I’d imagine, to manufacture that same level of tenacity and fight 82 games a year, but at the core, Jamie Benn is undoubtedly a passionate person and player. He stands up for his teammates. He could give a rats ass about individual accolades. (And by the way, he has a laundry list of them.) He has a calm, funny, likable demeanor that allows him to lead his team in his own unique way. The guys respond. He may not say much day in and day out to the media, but put a mic on him (I’ve done it many times) and he’s talking the whole practice, keeping the team energized, making jokes, and leading by example. Day after day after tiring day, he keeps it light and makes it fun for his teammates to come to work. All that said- boy does he ever have an edge. Piss him off and he’ll fight. He doesn’t care if he may get hurt. To him, it’s worth it to stand up for a teammate or motivate his team.
But aside from all of that, Jamie Benn is a 29 year old with feelings. He’s somebody who is thousands of miles away from home trying to bring a cup to his team and city. He’s somebody who treasures his friends and family. He’s somebody that hates that he’s only been able to spend a few days with his new baby niece. He’s somebody who saw his best friend, roommate, and brother unexpectedly traded away from Dallas out of nowhere a couple seasons ago. Yeah, it’s a business but it still stings. He’s somebody who just made the most public, kind, genuine gesture to give my mother in law, who he knew was struggling with an incurable cancer diagnosis, a day in the sun and spotlight in his hometown of Vancouver. He’s babysat my kid, just because he likes kids and had some time to kill. He donates his time and money to fight MS, because it’s a cause near and dear to his heart. Jamie Benn is somebody who has captured a city and fan base with his genuine personality, and somebody who was clearly hurt by the unfiltered words about him plastered around the league this week.
No doubt Jamie Benn and Tyler Seguin grew up watching Hockey Night in Canada and dreamt of making it to the big show. Now they’re here, and they get to see their names and head shots next to "F*cking Horsesh*t" on that same show they watched as kids, as well as many other TV and computer screens across the continent. Their moms, dads, little sisters, grandmas and grandpas get to see those words too. The many kids who look up to them get to see obscenities next to their idols names. The families in which the Stars are asking to spend hundreds of dollars on tickets and, yes, Benn and Seguin jerseys, have to see those nasty words about their favorite players too. And while the words could have been perfectly warranted, that all just hurts my heart a little bit.
Jamie Benn and Tyler Seguin have been tested, and they’ll come out firing. They’re going to play for each other and their team and their dignity more than ever. Hopefully they’ll lead this team to the postseason and beyond. Maybe they’ll even end up hoisting a cup one day in the near future. But make no mistake, it will be for their families, their fans, their coaches, their teammates, and for each other. If this all ends well, hopefully this bump in the road will just be a page turning chapter in Sean Shapiro’s next book about the second Dallas Stars Championship team. Hopefully it’s all forgotten. But this approach just doesn’t feel right.
And look at that-- the baby’s crying. I did it!
